I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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