haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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