Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
