come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
