her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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