now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize