Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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