Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
