Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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