I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
