Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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