I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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