i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Randomize
