and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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