I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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