Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
