You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
