Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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