im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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