you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
