Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize