I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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