I must be too annoying 4 u.
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
