Having a random hookup so left but love u
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
