hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
