So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Randomize