did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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