there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize