Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
