I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
