So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
