woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
