Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize
