Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
