Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
