Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
We had to coat check the pizza.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
