THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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