Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
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