Just cropdusted the office
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
where are you?
Hypothermia
did i walk over a car last night?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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