You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
