you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
