just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
