Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
