he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
