I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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