So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
