He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
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