Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
