isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
