Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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