Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
